Today I went into uni really early. The train was packed so I hopped on the first carriage. Some loud mouthed young boys with rat tails were looking in at the driver, "Cool, I can see the tracks." Said one. In retrospect they had a good reason for peeping in. We rode in silence, the boys had left. The only sound was the faint electronica of the driver's favorite radio station muffled by the door. The song changed to some really girly RnB and the driver started singing along with it! He drowned out the lead female vocalist, rhianna or someone, I think the song was something about being high... The weirdest thing though, was that I was the only person in the standing carriage that smiled. I couldn't stop my mind from running ahead, that bus driver must moonlight as the subwoofer train, you can hear it coming by the faint doof doof radiating from the tracks for kilometers ahead.
Social phobia reared it's head again today. I couldn't talk properly to Elaine, she is always sitting with Steven, who I know is a good guy but the problem is he hardly ever smiles. So every time I talk to either of them I feel like I'm being judged, which makes it even more likely (I can feel my face contorting involuntarily into little creases of worry). It doesn't help that I get no time to speak with either of them during class. Maybe I should tag along with them after class next time, I don't know. Anyway I learned that she volunteers for FBI radio! So cool! To be able to meet all the faces behind the voices would be epic.
Umm, I've been listening to Beach House recently. They were recommended to me several months ago by the guy at JB Hi Fi, along with a bunch of other bands. For some reason I kept forgetting their name but a quick clean of my room on the weekend overturned the tiny slip of paper he had written on. They are really good, definitely not the most experimental but pleasant to listen to and some of the best indie artists I've heard. Check em out! They're on YouTube obviously!
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Likes, interests?
Dear diary, upon which I spew stories to become internet trash the moment they are published. How are you? You look stunning in that new design. Don't listen to what those other sites are saying about you. They are just trying to fit in.
Today I saw Salt at Hurstville Cinema. It tickles, to say the least. There are many aspects that fit the standard formula for an action movie, including the 'don't know how to aim' shooting scenes, and ridiculously high suspense building. The story is a little different. You can't trust the main character (and only really keen readers will be able to glean a spoiler from that statement).
I signed on to facebook the other day, nothing much happens there except for the really active facebook users and they are uninteresting because they spend all their time online. It made me appreciate how much I prefer my blog.
One of the things I couldn't bring myself to complete was listing all my favorite movies, tv shows, books, music and interests. Seriously, anyone who wants to find out about me can just ask... Otherwise I'm just adding to a bunch of unreliable statistics. They are the things I should be yelling about in blog form!
kind regards,
- Michael
Today I saw Salt at Hurstville Cinema. It tickles, to say the least. There are many aspects that fit the standard formula for an action movie, including the 'don't know how to aim' shooting scenes, and ridiculously high suspense building. The story is a little different. You can't trust the main character (and only really keen readers will be able to glean a spoiler from that statement).
I signed on to facebook the other day, nothing much happens there except for the really active facebook users and they are uninteresting because they spend all their time online. It made me appreciate how much I prefer my blog.
One of the things I couldn't bring myself to complete was listing all my favorite movies, tv shows, books, music and interests. Seriously, anyone who wants to find out about me can just ask... Otherwise I'm just adding to a bunch of unreliable statistics. They are the things I should be yelling about in blog form!
kind regards,
- Michael
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Double party weekend
The last two nights have been spent socializing at my little sister's 18th birthday parties. There were two of them one for each side of the family.
I somehow got through my first party, where I had to avoid the person from whom I was sitting directly opposite. That was not difficult, I am a master at tolerance of that sort. I'm being mean here but I don't care if she was unnerved by that ability or not, I assume she did the same. I spent the night talking to my cousins mainly. Hehe, even the little one thought I was funny when I was drunk (I have a much more loose usage of this term - I had 3 drinks and was already starting to slur my words). I may have even gotten some of them interested in go.
I held the camera for a lot of the night. I need to learn to take more pictures and have a lot of throw-aways. Trying to get the best shot does not always work out well if it blurs for example. Grandad had a lot to say about his work (philosophy), which I listened to rapt. The subject matter is so much more interesting that his previous projects. He is investigating the idea that everything is interconnected from the point of view of western philosophy. It is a very old idea that never was given much attention. Basically the greeks had a god for it, Gaia.
The second party was last night, my mother's shindig at home. Some of the guys and girls there (direct friends of my sister) are very immature party types. I was glad to have a buddy I could rely on while I was there. Albert and I went into my room and played music, there is especially one song UMO by OOIOO with such a funny video clip we couldn't stop laughing for minutes after the song. I drank only spirits, even though I was looking forward to a night of wine but that's not possible with my sister's friends around.. A bit of it is still in my system and I can't think straight. I am not extroverted, and am still drained from last night. Alcohol is a silly thing, although I do appreciate being able to speak more freely and not be so stressed about saying and doing the right things the conversation is very much diminished. I prefer the opposite side of things, coffee highs will make you speak really quickly and usually coherently. We had horrible music, with excessive bass. I couldn't recognize barely any of the songs my sister had chosen. I was a little surprised because her taste in music is good.
The cake was beautiful. The speeches were a continuous stream of laughter and claps at the expense of some people's dignity.
I guess I learned a lot about how to behave at parties, but it doesn't make me appreciate them any more. I probably would have preferred to go to Bodhi Nite Thank You dinner hosted by the executive commitee, at least then I could have played around (verbally!) with the girl that I like.
The most important part of being all grown up is being able to choose your friends...
I somehow got through my first party, where I had to avoid the person from whom I was sitting directly opposite. That was not difficult, I am a master at tolerance of that sort. I'm being mean here but I don't care if she was unnerved by that ability or not, I assume she did the same. I spent the night talking to my cousins mainly. Hehe, even the little one thought I was funny when I was drunk (I have a much more loose usage of this term - I had 3 drinks and was already starting to slur my words). I may have even gotten some of them interested in go.
I held the camera for a lot of the night. I need to learn to take more pictures and have a lot of throw-aways. Trying to get the best shot does not always work out well if it blurs for example. Grandad had a lot to say about his work (philosophy), which I listened to rapt. The subject matter is so much more interesting that his previous projects. He is investigating the idea that everything is interconnected from the point of view of western philosophy. It is a very old idea that never was given much attention. Basically the greeks had a god for it, Gaia.
The second party was last night, my mother's shindig at home. Some of the guys and girls there (direct friends of my sister) are very immature party types. I was glad to have a buddy I could rely on while I was there. Albert and I went into my room and played music, there is especially one song UMO by OOIOO with such a funny video clip we couldn't stop laughing for minutes after the song. I drank only spirits, even though I was looking forward to a night of wine but that's not possible with my sister's friends around.. A bit of it is still in my system and I can't think straight. I am not extroverted, and am still drained from last night. Alcohol is a silly thing, although I do appreciate being able to speak more freely and not be so stressed about saying and doing the right things the conversation is very much diminished. I prefer the opposite side of things, coffee highs will make you speak really quickly and usually coherently. We had horrible music, with excessive bass. I couldn't recognize barely any of the songs my sister had chosen. I was a little surprised because her taste in music is good.
The cake was beautiful. The speeches were a continuous stream of laughter and claps at the expense of some people's dignity.
I guess I learned a lot about how to behave at parties, but it doesn't make me appreciate them any more. I probably would have preferred to go to Bodhi Nite Thank You dinner hosted by the executive commitee, at least then I could have played around (verbally!) with the girl that I like.
The most important part of being all grown up is being able to choose your friends...
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Unibuds Bodhi Nite
2010-08-28
I'm still dizzy from yesterday haha, no Dizzy is the (nick?) name of a guy in the buddhist society of unsw, Unibuds. Last night was their anniversary, they always put on a wonderful show with dhamma talks and choir songs. The show may only run from 7pm to 10:30, but there is a lot of preparation that goes into it. This year I came back as part of decoration department.
I was supposed to arrive at 9am, but some ill advised birdie force fed me alcohol last night! (actually the alcohol just went with the movie.. something about the rape of Nanking in b/w. The ending that I saw before going back upstairs to play SC). Then I played Star Craft until 2:30 am, with my brother watching me for the last hour or so. I kicked ass as both terran and zerg. I'm honing my terran skills because they are of course the race that I identify most with, and it's so much fun to live out my fantasies of every sci-fi book in the form of a human army.
I arrived at 11am, with lots of work to do. We pinned the gold cloth to the altar and arranged the buddha with flowers and candles around on top of it. I tended to get in the way most of the time, so I held back and let the girls do most of the work, even though they didn't know why I wasn't helping... argh miscommunication ho.
The funniest little drama happened half way through pinning the black cloth to the boards at the front of reception. We were using some of the gaffer tape and Jia Yin wanted to help. I was about to start tearing off strips from the roll of tape when she gave me a strange look 'what are you doing?' so I just gave her the entire roll of tape and figured I'd find some other way to help pin the cloth. She then, with one small piece of tape that I had torn off for her on her index finger, tore off another bigger piece and gave it to me!? We were both really confused. It was irresistibly cute and overwhelmingly awkward!
Everything looked nice, it was time to open the doors. I stood in front of the message board and offered people the pens to write messages. I met a guy called Victor in a white jacket with gold flower patterns, a long woolen scarf, fantastic beautiful wrinkles, and a camera. He was looking for interesting faces to take pictures of. He showed me a couple of convincing shots and told me to go to the state library for a photography competition that is being displayed there at the moment. I also met Mrs Lim, the wife of the founder of Unibuds. She was very nice to me. There were many other amazing people everywhere. All the while I couldn't help smiling (manaically?) I don't know how other people keep straight faces around so many other people... This is me exploring the boundaries of my social awkwardness.
Lillian, Adeline and Amy were there too, I met a guy called Jack again, we both knew eachother's faces but couldn't pin down where we had seen eachother before. Alex was helping out in catering as well, he asked me for 'innocent anime movies' and I just laughed at him ha ha ... ah. Julian (one of the only other white guys) on the piano told me about his family and how he had somehow managed to rope in 8 relatives to see the show.
I finally had a chance to get to know Ivy, one of the other members of Deco. Unfortunately Melody was practicing with choir all day and I barely had the chance to say hi... Melody is incredibly beautiful in a unique way. I like her lots. And that's all I'm willing to write in my blog about her!
After the great show, with some very inventive scripting and interjections from the little babies in the audience who laughed at all the right moments, we all went out to supper! At a place called Super Bowl (although the sign says Super Meal - the chinese speakers translate it directly from the chinese as bowl). I sat next to a senior member, Eugene, who had worked in commercial real estate. He taught me some chinese words (cantonese) that I should have known from regular interaction. Shi Ying joined us, everybody had a good attempt at eating the loads of food but we were already stuffed from the lovely cake and delicious tofu at dinner (6-7pm). It was already past midnight at this time. We took photos and made lots of noise while toasting with tea.
The night ride home was enjoyable. Nobody made too much noise, or were too crazy looking. I sat next to someone reading a book and read my own in quiet. My feet were killing me by the time I arrived home. It was nice wearing good clothes yesterday, but forgive me if I don't immediately jump back into them.
I'm still dizzy from yesterday haha, no Dizzy is the (nick?) name of a guy in the buddhist society of unsw, Unibuds. Last night was their anniversary, they always put on a wonderful show with dhamma talks and choir songs. The show may only run from 7pm to 10:30, but there is a lot of preparation that goes into it. This year I came back as part of decoration department.
I was supposed to arrive at 9am, but some ill advised birdie force fed me alcohol last night! (actually the alcohol just went with the movie.. something about the rape of Nanking in b/w. The ending that I saw before going back upstairs to play SC). Then I played Star Craft until 2:30 am, with my brother watching me for the last hour or so. I kicked ass as both terran and zerg. I'm honing my terran skills because they are of course the race that I identify most with, and it's so much fun to live out my fantasies of every sci-fi book in the form of a human army.
I arrived at 11am, with lots of work to do. We pinned the gold cloth to the altar and arranged the buddha with flowers and candles around on top of it. I tended to get in the way most of the time, so I held back and let the girls do most of the work, even though they didn't know why I wasn't helping... argh miscommunication ho.
The funniest little drama happened half way through pinning the black cloth to the boards at the front of reception. We were using some of the gaffer tape and Jia Yin wanted to help. I was about to start tearing off strips from the roll of tape when she gave me a strange look 'what are you doing?' so I just gave her the entire roll of tape and figured I'd find some other way to help pin the cloth. She then, with one small piece of tape that I had torn off for her on her index finger, tore off another bigger piece and gave it to me!? We were both really confused. It was irresistibly cute and overwhelmingly awkward!
Everything looked nice, it was time to open the doors. I stood in front of the message board and offered people the pens to write messages. I met a guy called Victor in a white jacket with gold flower patterns, a long woolen scarf, fantastic beautiful wrinkles, and a camera. He was looking for interesting faces to take pictures of. He showed me a couple of convincing shots and told me to go to the state library for a photography competition that is being displayed there at the moment. I also met Mrs Lim, the wife of the founder of Unibuds. She was very nice to me. There were many other amazing people everywhere. All the while I couldn't help smiling (manaically?) I don't know how other people keep straight faces around so many other people... This is me exploring the boundaries of my social awkwardness.
Lillian, Adeline and Amy were there too, I met a guy called Jack again, we both knew eachother's faces but couldn't pin down where we had seen eachother before. Alex was helping out in catering as well, he asked me for 'innocent anime movies' and I just laughed at him ha ha ... ah. Julian (one of the only other white guys) on the piano told me about his family and how he had somehow managed to rope in 8 relatives to see the show.
I finally had a chance to get to know Ivy, one of the other members of Deco. Unfortunately Melody was practicing with choir all day and I barely had the chance to say hi... Melody is incredibly beautiful in a unique way. I like her lots. And that's all I'm willing to write in my blog about her!
After the great show, with some very inventive scripting and interjections from the little babies in the audience who laughed at all the right moments, we all went out to supper! At a place called Super Bowl (although the sign says Super Meal - the chinese speakers translate it directly from the chinese as bowl). I sat next to a senior member, Eugene, who had worked in commercial real estate. He taught me some chinese words (cantonese) that I should have known from regular interaction. Shi Ying joined us, everybody had a good attempt at eating the loads of food but we were already stuffed from the lovely cake and delicious tofu at dinner (6-7pm). It was already past midnight at this time. We took photos and made lots of noise while toasting with tea.
The night ride home was enjoyable. Nobody made too much noise, or were too crazy looking. I sat next to someone reading a book and read my own in quiet. My feet were killing me by the time I arrived home. It was nice wearing good clothes yesterday, but forgive me if I don't immediately jump back into them.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Is it over? Can I open my eyes now?
I know Tommy Dean will join me in blind ignorance of the Australian Federal Election 2010. He said so at the special TGIF a few weeks ago. The only thing I noticed and love the thought of is that the seat of Melbourne is now secured by a greens candidate.
I made great coffee this morning (either or my body is craving it exceptionally this morning). I also have donuts, that could be a factor in the mix.
I am talking nonsense, let's start the blog post now.
Last night I drew a picture of a tree, with lots of branches. It looks stunning and is a tribute to the phrase 'practice makes perfect' wrt drawing. All I need to do now is drift further away from my anime-roots and start distinguishing people's faces and styles to make characters and be able to draw preliminary comics / stories, which I guess is where all of this is headed. I came up with a good idea last night. It's one of those things where the story all falls out simply by analysis. In this case I considered a personality type, that of the mathematician / ideologist (which is rare, since I kind of am one and usually the closest things go unnoticed) and something that a guest speaker at my Professional Issues and Ethics course said about them. They are notoriously poor at communication skills. In fact you could easily call anyone with that sort of one track mind 'stupid'... Aaaand I forget where the story goes from there :P That's probably for the best, it always feels a bit wrong when you tear a page (or chapter) out of your own book. Better to transform and rewrite the bits that you know.
Last night I discovered music blogs xD Compilations of rare music, stylistic things that don't sell, all the classics that I should learn by title and artist, etc. I wish we had the bandwidth to download some of them !! I wish I had the time to go out and buy some video games too!
I know Tommy Dean will join me in blind ignorance of the Australian Federal Election 2010. He said so at the special TGIF a few weeks ago. The only thing I noticed and love the thought of is that the seat of Melbourne is now secured by a greens candidate.
I made great coffee this morning (either or my body is craving it exceptionally this morning). I also have donuts, that could be a factor in the mix.
I am talking nonsense, let's start the blog post now.
Last night I drew a picture of a tree, with lots of branches. It looks stunning and is a tribute to the phrase 'practice makes perfect' wrt drawing. All I need to do now is drift further away from my anime-roots and start distinguishing people's faces and styles to make characters and be able to draw preliminary comics / stories, which I guess is where all of this is headed. I came up with a good idea last night. It's one of those things where the story all falls out simply by analysis. In this case I considered a personality type, that of the mathematician / ideologist (which is rare, since I kind of am one and usually the closest things go unnoticed) and something that a guest speaker at my Professional Issues and Ethics course said about them. They are notoriously poor at communication skills. In fact you could easily call anyone with that sort of one track mind 'stupid'... Aaaand I forget where the story goes from there :P That's probably for the best, it always feels a bit wrong when you tear a page (or chapter) out of your own book. Better to transform and rewrite the bits that you know.
Last night I discovered music blogs xD Compilations of rare music, stylistic things that don't sell, all the classics that I should learn by title and artist, etc. I wish we had the bandwidth to download some of them !! I wish I had the time to go out and buy some video games too!
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Scribbler No.105891
The walls are closing in - scary walls with endlessly disturbing detail. The creative energies are swirling around with Terry Pratchett as my guide (the library brought in 3 more of his books that I haven't read - all discworld). I also constantly have my wacom tablet out and am drawing rigorously with that to see what sort of things I can make. My imagination when it comes to drawing things does not extend far, mainly because I don't see that many landscapes in most of the pictures I see from day to day, such as cartoons. They are all characters and obscure backgrounds like walls and doorways and the edge of a table. Really uninteresting. However I am thoroughly enjoying reading Bunny Reality over here
http://bunny.frozenreality.co.uk
and watching Invader Zim
I want to get the most out of that last burst of inspiration before university starts again.
One of the NaNo writers needs my support! She's not drinking alcohol throughout the entirety of July. I will email her now.
http://bunny.frozenreality.co.uk
and watching Invader Zim
I want to get the most out of that last burst of inspiration before university starts again.
One of the NaNo writers needs my support! She's not drinking alcohol throughout the entirety of July. I will email her now.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
a gem
I'm glad I dealt with drama before coming here to post. I could have accidentally turn this into a live journal by mistake!
Update: I've been reading webcomics, books, playing go, steeling myself for uni (which starts in under a month).
I played in the Go NSW state championship handicap division. I entered as a 2k, which is close to my actual rank, and played against opponents at 7k, 10k and 16k level. They all were given handicap stones so it was a difficult competition. Eventually I WON! bragging rights :D I even made a cool $100 out of it. Did I mention how much I love go? Well I love it even more now. Those games were incredibly tough and I had to reinvent my style to win. Since then it's been a rocky development period but I'm much stronger than I was before. It's like potential has been uncapped (not only in my playing ability but in my appreciation and understanding of the game).
Yeah, there was some drama at my dad's house recently (and with my brother less recently, but since my last post). I think it's all over now. I still have some stuff to take care of regarding my father but that's private.
Thanks to a particular webcomic and some thoughtful recommendations from the guy at JB Hi-Fi I'm listening to a whole different kind of music now and loving it. Stuff like Wolf Parade, Mogwai, Explosions in the Sky, Battles, Dan Deacon, Marnie Stern etc. I played some for Judith last night and she showed me some old-style jazz. I liked the Kansas City stuff with bass and piano.
Now the only thing I wish for is some social confidence. I have been thinking about it a lot. I am so uneasy around other people and it shows. I have to get through this and stop fighting with my self-analytical voices or I'll never be happy.
Update: I've been reading webcomics, books, playing go, steeling myself for uni (which starts in under a month).
I played in the Go NSW state championship handicap division. I entered as a 2k, which is close to my actual rank, and played against opponents at 7k, 10k and 16k level. They all were given handicap stones so it was a difficult competition. Eventually I WON! bragging rights :D I even made a cool $100 out of it. Did I mention how much I love go? Well I love it even more now. Those games were incredibly tough and I had to reinvent my style to win. Since then it's been a rocky development period but I'm much stronger than I was before. It's like potential has been uncapped (not only in my playing ability but in my appreciation and understanding of the game).
Yeah, there was some drama at my dad's house recently (and with my brother less recently, but since my last post). I think it's all over now. I still have some stuff to take care of regarding my father but that's private.
Thanks to a particular webcomic and some thoughtful recommendations from the guy at JB Hi-Fi I'm listening to a whole different kind of music now and loving it. Stuff like Wolf Parade, Mogwai, Explosions in the Sky, Battles, Dan Deacon, Marnie Stern etc. I played some for Judith last night and she showed me some old-style jazz. I liked the Kansas City stuff with bass and piano.
Now the only thing I wish for is some social confidence. I have been thinking about it a lot. I am so uneasy around other people and it shows. I have to get through this and stop fighting with my self-analytical voices or I'll never be happy.
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